Nanny Duty

For the next few days, I will be babysitting South Carolina. Yes, it's true. The Bassman and Fuchsia are gone and Stacy, Ron, and Rachael are headed to Tundra Land for a surprise visit. The way I figure it, that leaves me in charge.

Every babysitter in the world has their own rules. It makes things easier to put the expectations on the table first thing so there will be no question of misbehavior. Here are mine for South Carolina;

A.) Smile. It is a fairly easy thing to do, cost nothing, and brings pleasure to others. If you wish to take this one step further (go at your own pace), add a head nod and a 'Hello'. Extra dessert for everyone who pulls this off.

B.) Tourists - if you don't know where you are going, pull off the road and read a map. If you have a gps and the map is not the issue, then learn how to read speed limit signs. Failure to do so will result in two weeks of no television.

C.) Locals - get off your high horses. Just because you have lived here for a year or two does not make you a Son or Daughter of the South. You are no better than the person who moved here this month. Straighten up. Natives (of which I believe there are approximately 6) are exempt from this.

D.) Bedtimes. I am flexible on this one. You can stay up late as long as you promise to not be cranky the next day. Oh yeah, and you must be considerate of the people who go to bed before you do. If you wake your neighbors, I am taking your internet away from you for a week.

E.) Messes. Pick up after yourself. Everywhere. Extra points if you pick up for someone else.

That's it. Simple and straightforward. Follow the rules while I am babysitting and at the end, I will take you to the movies! Or to a miniature golf course. Maybe even dinner in a restaurant.

Just not shopping.